Shooting Stars
I have spent 12 hours in the not-so-new National National Library hitherto.
Shooting people is a crime and now I understand what is consensual and non-consensual sex.
You become such a fucking slut when you let your pictures be taken by people you know. You give your hand gestures. You give seductive poses. You give expressions that shout attention. Because you know the person. You let the person do what they want. You are safe. You can relax and let the person fuck all he/she wants. There is nothing to lose. I think.
But if you are shooting complete strangers, it becomes rape. It becomes an outrage of modesty. It becomes worse than an outrage of modesty. It becomes rape. They give you the unwilling look. They dun give you your eye contact. And that sucks. You need eye contact to do your job. The worst part is, when your profession is a serial rapist, all the people gives you that lousy look and you feel like shit. I mean, come on, I've a job here. Just give it to me man.
Things improved after a while. People start to give their hand gestures but their faces remain lame. A terribly unsatisfied look. Well, maybe it's my fault. I don't do the 'hey look here, give me some hand gestures', I do the papparazi. Sneak in for the candids. So maybe I am a rapist. That's why they resent me. I force it upon them. I catch them offguard. And they hate me. They prefer if I asked. You know, just a simple question. Dance with me. What's your name. Mind if I take your picture sort of thing. They want cues. They want timing. They want rhythm. They want a process. Like a lousy and cheesy story told. Or maybe like a lousy foreplay or a pick-up line.
I tried. I tried using the 'smile a little'. You know, poke the side of the abdominal area. Come on. Come on. But very mild. Soft even. People tell me they cannot draw when I'm shooting. Which is telling me, stop looking at me when I'm urinating. I give me sorries and ohs.
So as usual I sit down quietly at one corner, trying to tell myself I'm cool, trying to tell myself I enjoy being a loner. Trying to tell people I'm cool. Trying to equate loner to cool. Trying hard to think I'm not a loser. Trying to disassociate loner and loser. But it's been interesting and something new so far. Shooting people. I've been fucked at the backside by strangers too often in the past. Boy am I enjoying it this time.
Shooting people is a crime and now I understand what is consensual and non-consensual sex.
You become such a fucking slut when you let your pictures be taken by people you know. You give your hand gestures. You give seductive poses. You give expressions that shout attention. Because you know the person. You let the person do what they want. You are safe. You can relax and let the person fuck all he/she wants. There is nothing to lose. I think.
But if you are shooting complete strangers, it becomes rape. It becomes an outrage of modesty. It becomes worse than an outrage of modesty. It becomes rape. They give you the unwilling look. They dun give you your eye contact. And that sucks. You need eye contact to do your job. The worst part is, when your profession is a serial rapist, all the people gives you that lousy look and you feel like shit. I mean, come on, I've a job here. Just give it to me man.
Things improved after a while. People start to give their hand gestures but their faces remain lame. A terribly unsatisfied look. Well, maybe it's my fault. I don't do the 'hey look here, give me some hand gestures', I do the papparazi. Sneak in for the candids. So maybe I am a rapist. That's why they resent me. I force it upon them. I catch them offguard. And they hate me. They prefer if I asked. You know, just a simple question. Dance with me. What's your name. Mind if I take your picture sort of thing. They want cues. They want timing. They want rhythm. They want a process. Like a lousy and cheesy story told. Or maybe like a lousy foreplay or a pick-up line.
I tried. I tried using the 'smile a little'. You know, poke the side of the abdominal area. Come on. Come on. But very mild. Soft even. People tell me they cannot draw when I'm shooting. Which is telling me, stop looking at me when I'm urinating. I give me sorries and ohs.
So as usual I sit down quietly at one corner, trying to tell myself I'm cool, trying to tell myself I enjoy being a loner. Trying to tell people I'm cool. Trying to equate loner to cool. Trying hard to think I'm not a loser. Trying to disassociate loner and loser. But it's been interesting and something new so far. Shooting people. I've been fucked at the backside by strangers too often in the past. Boy am I enjoying it this time.
posted by jingli K at 8:22 PM
1 Comments:
Making full use of the free wireless internet, I see.
Post a Comment
<< Home